I haven’t watched football in decades. I used to hang out with my girlfriends at the bar and I really got into it. Two decades and two kids later…well, who has time and really, who cares?
The old guys at work talk every day about football. It’s not hard to tune them out. The Toolcrib ladies always do a football pool. Usually a dandy too. Sometimes I get in and sometimes not. This year not.
The Superbowl wascoming. What to do? Well, drink of course. Have a friend over (Tara). Actually we had a goal in mind. You see, the night before my husband and Tara decide to go in on the cost of 99 bottles of wine at an Art & Wine Auction at the Catholic church (All proceeds went to the school. Cool.). I won’t tell you how much it went for. I really wasn’t expecting that when we showed up to this gala. Yeah, it was a gala. It was themed “Rendez vous e Paris”. Yes, I dressed funky with a black zipper dress, silver buckle boots, and a knit hat. Loved it! And yes, I drank a little too much that night. My facebook wall simply said “ow” the next morning.
Silly thing, Tara’s response to my facebook was “99 bottles of wine on the wall, take one down, get Charissa drunk, 99 bottles of wine on the floor.”
Naturally, a co-worker catches wind of this and says “Did you fall down go boom?”
I said “just call me Boom Boom”.
Anyways, we had 99 bottles to sort between us and we decided this was a good opportunity to sit down with the game on, let the kids run free, and drink. (Hair of the dog, I guess you could say. We didn’t go crazy this time. Really.)
For some reason, a few days prior I took up on a $20 bet from an ex-boyfriend on facebook clear across the country. Why, you asked? Because I grew up in a small town on the border of Minnesota and Wisconsin and my ex is from…you guessed it, Wisconsin. So of course, I didn’t want the Packers to win! Would you? Ok, don’t answer that.
Well, here we are in my living room. My friend’s on the floor sorting, separating, and sipping wine. My husband’s doing his thing making appetizers and drinking. And guess what I’m doing? Laundry, giving the kids a bath, keeping the 140 pound dog away from the wine bottles covering the floor, everything but watching the game. Tara was in her element and doing a great job. Didn’t want to get in the way there. My husband was in his zone in the kitchen. Don’t want to spoil the pot. So here I am doing stupid stuff.
The 1st quarter, I wasn’t that excited over the game. I thought it was lame. The 2nd quarter, I sit down long enough to watch the Steelers make a touchdown. Yay! Go team! Sip. Back up I go, putzing around. Then the 3rd quarter comes, I sit down. Touchdown Steelers! Yay! Go Team! Sip.
Now I’m thinking, I’m Lady Luck! The Steelers aren’t winning because I’m not watching the game. How rude of me not to give them my undivided attention and give them a shot at winning!
During all of this, I’m on facebook. Texting people at work, other people I don’t know. Making a big deal about a team that I’m really not supporting! For shame! I made mention that I saw how they got a touchdown whenever I paid attention so by golly, I was gonna plop my behind down on the couch and not move! And when I did….! They got two touchdowns in a row! Holy cow!
Now it’s on! I was not going to take my eyes off the screen!
Would you believe my three year old decides at this crucial moment to push his older sister around? Daddy put him in a time out. I continued to stare at the TV.
Here it comes! You ready?
I see my husband cross my view and notice he’s holding back laughter. What was making my husband want to crack up but not? I was drawn to it. There in the corner was my son, with his pants at his ankles, mooning us with that cute little behind. Wiggling his cheeks back and forth!
Oh no! I took my eyes off the screen! No, No! The Packers got the ball!
Aw man! Sip.
“Boom, Boom out go the lights” is the text I get.
My husband says the Packers owe me check for letting them win. ;)