Greta Schäfer

 
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I am adding this additional chapter to my introduction, because after I initially wrote the introduction, it was very difficult to come back to it and try to make sense of all that I have experienced through the various stages of my life and the trials that I have endured or overcome.  I wish ...


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The Birth of Charles Leonard Wiggins

The story has already been written for awhile on my blog "From the heart of Praise, Prayer and Perseverance. 0; Here is a link to that posting, Below are the pictures of the blessed event.   http://fromthehea rt-dotwigg.blogsp ot.com/2008/03/an other-2-prayer-re quest-answered.ht ml


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Greta's Story > Chapters > My Entire Life

"No Rüles " 

 

Date Range: 07/08/2008 To 07/08/2008   Comments: 10   Views: 27,168
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Soooo...last week I had gone to visit my ex in his new house (Rüles ).. a house without me, but his stuff, and this was really strange to see this new life he'd made, mainly just to see him and talk things out..it didn't end up like I wanted it to, and the kicker is, I don't even know why I'm back to caring.


We ended up flirting a bit back and forth and then he kissed me! I wondered if I would feel something. I did but I didn't. For a moment I flirted with the idea of giving us another try and forget about all past. I wanted to run and test out these new feelings for Rüles.


Being single isn't very fun. Especially coming up on the colder weather and holidays. Dating isn't very excieting either - a bunch of creeps with their own problems and agendas. And that all just shows how much I would give to just go back to how things were; when I was happy had someone I could count on to be there for me-to cheer me up when i was down, to turn a bad day into a good one, to listen when i had a problem, to hold me and make everything feel okay....to just BE THERE...


Then he told me he just didn't feel those feelings anymore; the kiss was a mistake. You know, the feelings that make every kiss like heaven, the feelings that make sex "making love,"....and I just couldnt hold back the tears...Sure, I'm not "in love" with him at this point..but I still love him..and I was even willing to start over, to just go on dates and give it time to be like it was..it's so hard for me to believe that a love as strong as what we had could be completely over..that it could just die...I can't let myself believe it...


So, I have asked Rüles if we could start over...to give it another chance and try. In the past there were times when I gave up on the relationship but I tried ot make it work for him even though I didn't want to.


The real question to all this is why do I care NOW? all of a sudden? I was doing fine without him...i mean i haven't been close to being as happy as i was, but i was moving on...what happened? why did i wait to care now..when it could be too late? .......he hasn't told me to bugger off and leave him alone...and he hasn't said no to starting over...all i can do is sit back, wait...



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Member Since
Jun 2008
Namiko Smith said:
posted on Oct 10, 2008
Hi Greta!

Reading your message is breaking my heart so bad since I have the same experince before. I don't know what you would like hear from me but I can say one thing. If it is meant to be, it will be.. Sometimes it takes so much time but every happening has a meaning to be the way whether it works out or not. Please hang in there... I know how tiring waiting can be...


Member Since
Aug 2008
Myka Piereonini said:
posted on Oct 11, 2008
Oh run

You don't want HIM; you want your old life back what you gotta do is make a list of ALL of the reasons you didn't want him, why you divorced, etc. Review that, tape it to the fridge if you got to. :)


Member Since
Jun 2008
nansy jones said:
posted on Oct 14, 2008
Sweetie,

I cannot believe that a woman as strong and independent as you are should have such thoughts!Why leave all that progress behind you and start over?You deserve sth much better than compromising!Don't let him decide you're stong enough to get by and make that decision yourself!I'm sure you'll make it I just believe in you,so start believing too+hang in there:):) My best wishes!!!


Member Since
Jul 2008
Greta Schäfer said:
posted on Oct 14, 2008
I was having a bad day

You know, being single is a lot harder than being together sometimes. But, being single means I get to do what I want when I want. I guess though, that Rules is not a bad guy. Know what I mean? If he were a bad guy, or I hated him, then it would be so much easier.


Member Since
Sep 2008
C D said:
posted on Apr 28, 2009
Girl I know it!

Seeing him beginning to carry on is hard. Harley is talking to some girl named Carson. She's so pretty. Makes me feel inferior. 


Member Since
Jul 2008
Greta Schäfer said:
posted on Apr 29, 2009
Carl

pfft. Beauty is just a passing fad. Too bad men are more shallow and prefer that, but judging from your piccies, you aren't exactly someone needing to put a bag over your head !! lol.

the thing is, youth cannot see its own beauty for all its glory. Getting uglier is the price paid for getting wiser. So listen when I tell you that you're very pretty and many, many men would want to go out with you.

But you need some time to really heal. He's jumping into something new becuz that's how some men cope. Rüles was at least kind enough to wait awhile then keep it out of my face, becuz it would have killed me. But you know what, we weren't right for each other. I think some day you'll see that maybe you and H weren't really right for each other either. I know that sounds kind of mean to say now, but only with these WRINKLES and GREY HAIRS I'm getiting does such wisdom become it.... hahahaha ..... enjoy your youth sweetie. You only get it once.


Member Since
Jul 2009
T G said:
posted on Jul 20, 2009
hey...

this part sucks doesn't it...?...

i just... and i mean JUST... left my man.... i've been in my own place since july 4th.... the hardest part is at night... lying in that big bed all by myself...and thinking during the day "oh that's funny, i should text dan and tell him"... and even grocery shopping, buying sliced peaches because i always did... (i hate canned sliced peaches!)... i totally understand what you're feeling... for me the problem is i still love him.... (but it's a long sordid tale of two new female friends, matching tattoos, staying out all night..etc... yuck!!)

being alone IS scary... it's the unknown.... so you want what's safe.. and known... but remember... there's a reason you are apart... and if you could love "rules", you can love someone else.... and maybe the next one is THE one....

big virtual hug to you... good luck...!!


Member Since
Jul 2008
Greta Schäfer said:
posted on Aug 22, 2009
TG

sorry for the delay - been traveling!

Know what I do when I think like that? I remember why we broke up. And that starts me off on a whole new thought pattern and then I can sleep just fine ;)


Member Since
Nov 2007
Luther Lazaretto said:
posted on Dec 30, 2009
Single

Trust me, after awhile he will be another "out of sight out of mind" past man for you.  Being single will take on a whole new meaning for you in the flash of an eye, just watch!


Member Since
Jan 2011
Denise Trimble said:
posted on Jan 26, 2011
love sucks

Hey I am so sorry for you no one wants to walk away and we have to rememeber if you louve it set it free if it comes home its yours if it dosnt then it never was, and we call this love. Dont push on him or you take the time to do you!