In the most beautifully painful time of his life, Nick Hall welcomed one child into this world and said goodbye to another. Out of adversity came hope. Out of hope, a cause. Out of a cause, a hand outreached to share with others in pain.
After the loss of one of their twin babies, Nick and his wife Jenn are starting a foundation for micro-preemie babies, Graham’s Foundation, which will share care packages with families dealing with the unique struggle of watching the tenuous journey a preemie takes outside the womb to proper development. A natural networker by personality and profession, Nick has found a way to encourage and support parents of preemie children who are faced with the medical roller coaster he and his wife are still riding.
Twins, Reece and Graham, were born to Nick and Jenn on November 23, 2006, by emergency C-section at 25 weeks and 3 days gestational age. Never leaving the NICU, Graham lived 45 days. Reece survived but continues to be fragile inside, susceptible to infection and illness.
Little baby Reece
Eleven years earlier, Nick and Jenn got married and enjoyed life, getting to know each other, working and thinking of kids as something the future held. Five years later, in 2000, the loving couple decided the time was right. Time to have a baby. Three weeks in Europe should do the trick so off they went. Coming home, they were disappointed to realize pregnancy was not happening quickly or easily but were not discouraged.
Flash forward a year, no baby. Time to see a fertility specialist. Clomid. Perginol. Another specialist. More years of trying, waiting, hoping. Finally, a fertility specialist in California offered the hope they needed after a total of 6 ½ years of trying to get pregnant.
Nick shares how important positive feedback was during this time. Their nurse, Kristen, told Jenn, “I really hope you get pregnant. You are such an awesome couple. You guys are the best patients and made the whole experience rewarding for us, too.”
The words “We’re pregnant” were short-lived when Jenn, at 22 weeks, developed pre-eclampsia and was put on immediate bedrest. Escalating blood pressure forced the doctors’ hands in delivering the babies on Thanksgiving Day. Jenn’s health prevented her seeing the babies until her own blood pressure stabilized, giving Nick time alone with the infants struggling to survive. Out of his hope and uncertainty, Nick wrote several poems to his children. One stanza in a poem written for Graham during this time, reads:
You're down a stroke
But you've got nerves of steel
This is your match to win
Perfect shot, velvet feel
Nick, Jenn and Reece
Both Jenn and Nick wanted to believe that both these miracle children would survive the early birth but intuition led Nick to believe his son’s life would be brief. The time in the NICU allowed them the solitary opportunity to focus so completely and beautifully on each other. Nick and Jenn are grateful for their days away from the distractions of the world, where their small family was their sole priority.
Jenn was finally able to hold Graham, about two weeks after holding Reece for the first time. Their nurse graciously reassured them that he knew he was being held and said, “Graham definitely knows that his Mom held him today.” It was only a few days before they would say “good-bye.” At least ten nurses attended Graham’s service.
Saying goodbye to baby Graham
When Nick and Jenn were able to take Reece home, they left the comfort and compassion of the nursing staff who were absolutely incredible to them. Going from the surreal world of nurses and doctors within reach, the new parents would join the rest of life and have to learn anew where to turn for support and assistance. Having a preemie takes special care as they develop and grow and hit benchmarks and learning goals. Parents wait with baited breath to make sure that everything is going to be okay.
From his own experience, Nick realized that while there is no way you can prepare for a situation 180 degrees from what you expect, that there is a way to provide support and encouragement to those once something does happen. Being so grateful to the men and women who separated themselves from negative “realistic” voices and gave compassion and hope in distress, Nick wanted to give back.
“Tragedy is the most effective force for good in the world,” shares Nick when talking about his own journey through life and death. He will tell you that he treasures the pain just as much as the beautiful moments because in those moments he was with his family and together they would face whatever life brought their way.
Another of Nick’s poems NICU, ends with:
“Adrenalin keeps us running friends say "anything you need" our wish is very simple a blooming flower from our seed As badly as we want to leave we want a long stay a one-of-a kind roller coaster that takes our breath away
Not a second of regret never a thought of "why me" this journey is a blessing this is our destiny”
As a final note, the family has left the California coast to be with family in Ohio, the LA boy in Nick knowing “it’s the right thing to do.” Reece is growing beautifully, walking and talking, and enjoys her pigtails, her dog Beignet, having the oxygen tanks taken away and celebrating her dad’s 39th birthday. 
At www.nickthenetworker.com, learn more about Nick and his work as a “conference guru,” as well as his “two cents on passions, dreams, miracles and all sorts of other stuff.” To learn more about Graham's Foundation, go to http://www.grahamsfoundation.org
Thank you Nick, for sharing your Story with us.
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© 2008 by Sarah Peppel and Story of My Life®