When Shyam started making French toast and handing it out to strangers on the street, he had no idea that the small act of cooking and gifting would transform his life. Who knew something so simple could be so much fun?
In 2000, two of Shyam’s close friends rescued a street dog named Daisy Mae. Their previous dog had passed away from cancer a few months before Daisy’s arrival, and Shyam had been caring for the dog when it died. The pain of losing a close furry friend was torturous and he never wanted to befriend another dog again. Then, along came Daisy. “Daisy was a very strange dog. She thought I was a dog! She would sit on top of my head, do all these weird things with me.” His friends thought Shyam was nuts. That is, until he had them go outside and watch Daisy’s antics when nobody else was looking and they realized Shyam was right. Daisy thought he was a dog! What’s more, Daisy was protective of Shyam, like he was a part of her pack and needed looking after. When Shyam left the house, Daisy whined and seemed genuinely worried. When he returned, she was visibly relieved. “When I would leave my friends said ‘Daisy doesn’t like it when you leave.’ So they gave me a dog tag that said ‘property of Daisy’ and had all Daisy’s information, their phone number and everything.” The tag actually calmed Daisy’s fears!
Shyam and Daisy’s human-doggy friendship continued to evolve and Shyam found himself conversing with Daisy a lot. During one of their “conversations,” the idea that the two should start a gang came up. “I was like, ‘Well, I like French toast.’ And Daisy likes giving hugs. So, we started a French toast and hugs gang!” A friend asked if they could join the gang and Shyam wasn’t sure. So, he turned to his furry pal to see just who would be allowed in French Toast and Hugs. “I asked Daisy. She said only if you are stone cold. I asked her what she meant by ‘stone cold.’ She said that stone cold is a person only capable of being who they are. But, who they are as a person only adds to the world and doesn’t take away from it. You can tell the people who are really stone cold right away.”
After that, things just started spiraling outward. The gang consumed Shyam’s thoughts. He began signing off on emails with “ftx,” the gang’s symbol, even though nobody knew what it meant and he talked incessantly about his gang. Friends wanted to join and so the gang took on new, stone-cold additions. However, it would be about two years or so before Shyam actually made any French toast. “My whole life I liked to write stories but I never really told anyone my stories because I was scared to share them. Then, all of the sudden I started telling people this story, ‘Oh yeah, I’m in this French toast gang.’ I look back and realize that this was me putting what’s on the inside of me outside. A human friend also named Daisy thought it was a really cool idea; she gave me this apron (with a French toast logo). I thought, ‘Wow I really have to make French toast now!’” Initially, Shyam began making French toast for friends. “At first, it was just with good friends. Then, strangers would ask if they could join. The more I stopped worrying about being strange, or weird, or whatever, the more people wanted to be a part of it.”
“When Shyam started making French toast and handing it out to strangers on the street, he had no idea that the small act of cooking and gifting would transform his life.”
Shyam’s first experience making French toast for the people was at the Burning Man festival. His friend Sean had attended the festival in 2001 and it had changed him completely. “In 2000, I met my friend Sean—he is number six in the gang. 2001, the year I started the gang, was the first year he went to Burning Man. He went there and saw the art and was so moved by it. He decided he wanted to be an artist. His sculptures now are the greatest things I’ve ever seen in my life! The experience showed me proof that anybody can do anything they want to do. I had to throw out all the lies I’d always told myself. He showed me that you CAN do anything you want.” Shyam liked the idea of this gathering of artists and performers doing something that will never be duplicated anywhere in the world not for money, just to give something of themselves. Just to do it. In 2003, he took his grill and his fixings and headed to Burning Man. While most people at the festival are partying and up at all hours, Shyam took his French toast gig seriously. “I did it as like a job. I literally had an alarm clock at Burning Man and went out at 7 am with a wagon. I randomly set up at different camps every single day and over that week probably fed 500-600 people. I realized, ‘Oh, I can do this!’”
Burning Man was a good start, but the environment was safe, contained. Shyam’s next step was to do his French toast thing for the general public. He wanted to make French toast for the people on a regular, normal business day in a regular, normal setting. A special effects artist by trade, Shyam was hired to work on a movie in India. He decided that this would be the location of his first truly public foray into French toast making. “I brought gallons of maple syrup as a carry-on item. When I got to India, they had put us up in lodging in a little bungalow. I went to the little restaurant nearby and talked to the manager. I said, ‘I want to hand out French toast to the people but I only have maple syrup.’ They said they would get me everything I needed! They set up a propane grill, got me bread, vanilla—and it was this delicious spicy vanilla, not like ours in the States—they even hired a person to watch me, like it was a secret recipe! So, I made French toast and handed it out for free.”
Most of the people fed in India were from the film crew, so while it was a start, it didn’t seem like that big of a deal to Shyam. He wanted to go bigger. “I got hired on Spider Man 3. I said I’d do it if I could hand out French toast, so they put my stove on the van and drove it (from Los Angeles) to New York.” Working with his small Coleman grill and the help of a handful of stone cold friends, Shyam set up shop in the middle of Times Square. Cab drivers would screech to a halt and Shyam and his cronies would throw French toast in the windows and the cabs would drive off. When the cops arrived, they looked at the ingredients Shyam had assembled—always the best Challah bread, maple syrup, berries, and other goodies he can find—and said that Shyam had no permit, but that unless somebody complains they’d take a few slices themselves before shutting him down! Then the cops got on the radio and called their other police friends. Cops were literally running down the block to get French toast. “I’ve never had a cop run at me and not been afraid before!”
Since then, Shyam’s French toast has touched lives—and bellies—all over the world. He’s hosted French toast events in Santa Monica, Echo Park, downtown Los Angeles, New York’s Central Park, Australia, and New Zealand. And, he wants to set up his grill in his hometown of Philadelphia (scheduled for July 4, 2009), among other places. Together with his gang, he’s fed and handed out hugs to an estimated 5,000 to 6,000 people. “It’s the only time that I feel like I’m doing what I’m supposed to be doing. When I do my job, I’m good at my job, but it doesn’t give me a whole lot of joy. When I do this, it’s like this is exactly what I’m supposed to do. People wait in line, the music is playing, they are talking and laughing. People feel good. I don’t have a plan with this thing. But I do know that the more I do it, the better I feel.”
In addition to making French toast, Shyam really loves music. So, each French toast experience has its own soundtrack. “When I did the one in New York I made a playlist and had an iPod and we were playing it. I didn’t really think about it. I thought I’d make a CD for the people who helped out. It was a nice thing to do. Then I thought I’ want to make a soundtrack for every single one, with music specific to the event!’ Now I make about 100 CDs and hand them out. When we did downtown LA, I knew it would be a lot of homeless people, a lot of down-and-out types. I wanted some really positive rock. This one moment I looked up, we had Marvin Gaye playing and there was there was this homeless guy just singing really loud. It made me laugh—I knew that music was right! The downtown LA one was the most important one to me. I fed people who needed food. Some of them hadn’t eaten whipped cream in years.”
While it may seem silly, making French toast has helped Shyam connect with something larger than himself. And each event has served to fuel his passion even more. “It’s not something I planned. I took all the things I love in life—carbs, music, my friends—and it turned into this! It’s easy to think that when there is so much trouble out there, people are troubled. But if you give them a moment, people aren’t that bad. They want to be bigger than something they are now.” Shyam’s friends have taken his beginning and run with it. He now has pals wanting to put on live dance performances at the event and some have said the experiences have changed their lives. “All I did was go out and create an environment and my friends did the rest. My friend Henry made the web site (http://www.frenchtoastandhugs.com/). I have a 15-year-old friend, Dalton, who is so excited to be a part of it. He said when I move back to Philly full-time, he’d start his own French toast gang! It’s been really great to see people motivated by this. My friend Trevin was changed after our downtown experience, working with all the homeless. He was like, ‘Wow I want to volunteer all the time. What was I afraid of?’”
Every time Shyam makes French toast, good things happen. In Santa Monica, a police officer came to shut down the permit-less food operation. Shyam’s human friend Daisy stepped up to coax the officer into letting the group stay. After exhausting all her cajoling methods, she just turned to the cop and said, “C’mon, you don’t really want to shut down all this love do you?” At that moment, Kermit the Frog came out of the speakers, singing “The Rainbow Connection.” Everyone looked at each other and laughed and the cop didn’t shut them down. In New Zealand, Shyam was unable to find strawberries because they were out of season. Bummed about ruining his French toast, he complained to the first person he saw, Zach, a worker on his movie set there. Zach replied with, “That’s not a problem.” Turns out Zach’s brother ships strawberries from Central California to New Zealand for a living! When the day of the event came, there were cases of ripe, delicious strawberries flown in especially for Shyam. “As people we all want to control things but the moment I let it go it always seems to work out. It always works out. All these people were flying in to our New Zealand event, and it was torrential rains every day. Literally, though, the day I was supposed to do it, it was sunny! About five or six people flew in from Australia and Los Angeles. Just for French toast! Just to help. It was amazing. It is amazing to look up and see your friends and know they came just to be a part of your dream. And it makes you want to be part of theirs.”
Shyam freely admits he has no idea what he wants to do with his life. But, the one thing he does know is that he wants to keep making French toast! “Before I did the French toast I felt like, I have to do these things (work hard to get ahead, etc.) because this is what everyone does. Then I started French toast and realized, ‘I don’t have to do this!’ I might have to live a little differently, but I don’t have to live this way. It is living proof that this kind of life is not true. There is nothing to fear on this planet except for yourself. You are the only one who can let yourself down.”
Now, when he thinks about what it means to be a good person, a stone cold person, Shyam has a clear idea of what that is. “You kind of define your own reality, I’ve learned from my friends. The world needs people who give themselves freely. We all affect each other. We need to all go out there and do it. I don’t know what it is that I want to do out there, but I want to have a connection. At the end of my life, I want to feel like I’ve added.”
Thank you Shyam, for sharing your Story with us.
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© 2009 by Tamar Burris Story of My Life®